Things happen, things out of my control. Things that aren’t fair but could never be undone no matter how much forgiveness had been extended. Words get said. Actions get done. Hurt gets underestimated, overlooked and eventually pushed up under the rug of my soul. Over time, the wounds scab over, appearing to be healed on the outside. All the while the infection hidding beneath was very alive, and it wasn’t just going to go away. All along it was poisoning and destroying from the inside out. And no one even noticed. Not even me.
Over time little things added up to big things and before I even realized it, resentment had blanketed my entire being – choking out life, choking out joy, choking out destiny, choking out faith, choking out love.
All the while, I’ve wanted to be near you but felt feel so far away. I wanted to hear you but the silence is deafening. I’ve been barely hanging on and I wondered when would you come to me?
Then you showed me that nothing could separate me from your love, and yet there’s been so much coming in between my love for you. So much junk that I had neglected to just pour out at your feet and let you take it on yourself.
I’m ready. Ready to pour it all out. Every hurt. Every lie. Every failure. Every sin. All my pride. Everything that resides in my heart robbing it from being filled with you.
Jesus I empty me, begging for you to fill me up again with everything that you are.