, , , , ,

If there is one thing that bugs me in a huge way, it’s when someone calls themselves a friend, or claims to care about me but never bothers to pick up to the phone to call and see how I am and definitely never takes time of their life out to actually spend time with me and get to know me. To be honest, I just don’t buy it.

However annoyed I might get, sometimes I find myself guilty of the very thing I can’t stand. It’s called DYSFUNCTION. I’ve had to evaluate in my own life why it is that we tend to form and then attempt to maintain relationships with others, all while keeping them ourselves out of arms length.

What I’ve discovered – It’s because those kind of “relationships” don’t require anything of us.  There is a difference between an acquaintance and a friend. And liking someone’s status on Facebook or posting on their wall does NOT make someone a friend. In all honesty, people who claim to just love me so much yet haven’t shown their face in months and won’t take me up on any offers to spend time together scare me just a little. It makes me feel like they don’t really want me, they’re just nosey and want to keep tabs on my life.

Even more scary, sometimes I DO IT.

It makes me wonder if this magical world called “social media” in which most of us spend time living in isn’t a ginormous contributor to the dysfunction of modern day relationships.

I have a love/hate relationship with social media. I would be big time lying to say I don’t love it. I really do. I think it’s beneficial in many ways and I use it a lot. However, good things like Facebook, Twitter and others can also become negatives in our lives when we choose to let them become a wall for us to hide our real selves behind.

Instead of actually BEing a real person with real relationships, we throw bits and pieces of a self created image out there through edited pictures, status updates and tweets for all our “friends and followers” to see and then somehow think that is enough.

It’s not. And without balancing our social lives online with relationships in real life it is plain out unhealthy

and we need to stop it.

Real connection in relationships, churches and families is pathetically missing in our culture and it’s time we stop being okay with the way things are.

So go ahead! Go find that “friend” of yours on Facebook you haven’t seen in forever, stop looking through pictures of her life and invite her out for a lunch date and actually get to know her! Get off her wall and into her life. Speaking from experience, I guarantee she will feel so much more loved and cared about and you might find that you actually like her.  😉

I’m going first!  🙂