Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God {Titus 1:4-5}

I have a question that’s been nagging me for some time now. As a girl who grew up in the church, I remembering hearing teaching on how the older women were to be examples to the younger and to teach them. I guess naively I believed since it should work that way, it would. And so I found myself waiting, even searching for those “older” women the Scriptures spoke of. It sounded wonderful and I wanted and needed those older mentors in my own life. And for a time I had believed they’d be plenteous. 

I was wrong.

When these amazing women do exist, I have found out the hard way that the legitimate busyness and cares of their own lives have exhausted them until they have nothing left to give out, and they are definitely too overwhelmed to bother themselves with the likings of a twenty something year old and all her stuff.

And I partially understand that. But to be totally honest, sometimes I feel robbed.  At 27 years of age until right now, one of the unspoken questions inside is, “Where ARE these women the Bible speaks of?”

As a young woman, mother and wife though there may be lot I know (mostly by finding out the hard way) but there is a lot more I don’t know. And I wonder how much wisdom I could be gaining from a women who’s been where I am. There is so much I long to learn from a women who’s genuinely in love with Christ and whose life reflects it. I love pouring myself into others, but call me selfish, I still find myself craving the mentorship of older, wiser women who will pour into my life.

I’m pretty sure I’m not the only young woman who feels this way. I think most of us realize we can’t and shouldn’t do life alone. But many of us feel disappointed at the lack of hope that it will be any different.

I know that sooner than I’d like to believe my day will come to be one of those “older women” who mentor the younger. But just for now, I want my turn to be on the receiving end.

I know times are different and women have a lot more roles to juggle than past times. But even still, what would happen to all of the younger generations to follow if every woman who loves Jesus over the age of 30 made it a priority in her life to find just one “younger” woman to bring up under her wing, mentor and pour into? And then the cycle continued on and on.

Please don’t misunderstand, I am not saying these women don’t exist, I’m just wondering why they are so incredibly hard to find?

Just a question my heart has been pondering and a huge issue I’ve been asking God about.



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